Bring Me Back

April 7, 2017

I didn’t mean for it to get so cold
Must be the air-conditioning in my soul
I turned it down too low
And now the thermostat’s broken, so
Can you hear me now
I turned off the water

Reason me back into reasoning
Help this dust settle
That my vision might clear

The dreams seem to have returned
Maybe for a little while
My heartbeat might revive
Some sort of fog rolled over
Might have lifted for a while

Breathe my breath back into me
Help this smoke disperse
That my vision might clear

I’m lifting my feet
But there’s mud stuck on them
Maybe it might wear off
Hold my hand
I can’t feel anything

Of Lust and Lethargy

December 3, 2015

This place, it is dark and soiled.
Its uncured leather bands,
Tied to bind my hands
Grind onto me the miasma,
The sweat of clouded minds
And it burdens all my toil.

I hate them
They hurt me
They lead me astray
There is no dawn
My Hope seems far away
I’ve been fenced from the table

I find me the fool
I cannot labor for I guard
My fallow fields under a foul star
Of lust and lethargy
Alone surrounded and
Covering my ears from the cruel

The hope I’d found
I found so sweet
It disappeared
With the horizon
That life I feared
Came back as the hope faded

The cruel words, the thrusts
The putrescence that surges to me
Pulls out my tongue, Drags at me,
And forces me to wag
A bitter stream of cursed nightmares
Things I left, I left back there

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Originally published on: Mar 12, 2012

Emptiness and Lies

September 14, 2013

Two walk on the causeway
The narrow way cannot contain
Any distance
Still they walk

I wish you loved me for what I have done
But what have I done?
My sin kills your love

I wish you loved me for what I love
But that too is what I’ve done
My sin kills your love

I am not what you should love
My pride says this is insanity
My sin says I am enough

How easily I lie
To me
And you

The ice lies thick
Thick with emptiness
For we do not love
What we should

I will recant my lies
So tomorrow I will not
Be the same as today

Or

Oh yes I will
Still lying to me
Just as I am right now

O’ Lord, come quickly
For I am not enough for me
Or much of anything

Forgive me
I must rest in my Lord’s rest
For that is all I have
And you too.